Thursday, February 20, 2014

And the Journey begins...

You’re back! So are you ready for the ride? I sure as hell wasn’t, but I didn’t really have a choice. Ha! I don’t think anyone would want to go through such a thing. Even if they didn’t want kids, most women want the option to at least be able to REJECT the idea of having kids, and not be forced to that decision.
At age 19, (I’m now 29), my OBGYN said to me, you have PCOS. Meh! At the time I was, “Whatever, I’ll worry about it when I get there.” Fast-forward now to when I was 23, a couple of months before getting married (I got married in November of 2007), I went to my OBGYN for my annual check-up and the conversation of my wedding started. My doctor then asked me if I was planning to continue on the birth-control (since I had been on it for the PCOS). I told her that I wasn’t sure, I said that I remembered she had mentioned something about maybe having some issues trying to get pregnant if my PCOS got very active, but my fiance and I didn’t want to have kids right away. We left it at, I would talk to my soon to be husband and see what we decide. So after discussing it carefully with my fiancé, we decided to not be on birth-control and see what the future held for us. Little did we know what a ride it would be.
We got married, had a wonderful large wedding with all of our loved ones sharing the moment. One month, three months, nine months, fifteen months went by and nothing. It was weird. I hadn’t got a period for the past 12 months. We had been off birth-control for 15 months and no baby? The worry started. After I got off the birth-control in November, I had a regular period for 3 months, and then by the time our second Valentine’s day came around in 2009, I had gone without a period for a whole year! Something was up. I decided to visit my OBGYN on an irregular visit to discuss my situation a little further.
She mentioned to me that I should get a pelvic ultrasound and see what’s going on. So I did. The results came back and she said, “Your ovaries seem to have a few small cysts. It’s nothing to worry about, but it’s preventing you from getting a period, which is why you used to be on birth-control. What I can do is provide you with the beginning stages of fertility treatments for PCOS Patients, if and only if, you and your husband are ready to be parents.” My husband and I had already discussed the fact that we were ready to be parents, therefore, I said sure, and she started me on 500 mg of Metformin (this medication is used for diabetics as well as PCOS patients) for  3 months. In June, She then upped the dosage to 1000 mg (2 pills a day) and Provera. This combination actually got my ovaries working and I had a period for 5 months. A couple of BFN’s because my period was a little wacky and sometimes they would be late, but no pregnancy. My OBGYN then increased my Metformin from 1000 mg to 1500 mg and my Provera continued. We went with it until the last week of April in 2010.
While on vacation in Mexico City with my family, I got really sick. Nausea, dizziness, faint-feeling, if I hadn’t had my period a week and a half earlier, I would have thought I was pregnant without a doubt. My mom was so adamant about it, though, that she even had me doubting. Could this be it? Can I really be preggers? So she ran to the pharmacy and got me a couple of pee sticks, more BFN’s! Blah! Whatever. It’s fine, I probably just ate something and got me this sick. We came back home and the following day as I’m getting ready to go to the doctor to see why this nausea and sickness hadn’t left my system, I fainted coming out of the shower. HOLY SMOKES! Maybe I am pregnant and I’m just one of those people that never gets a positive test and needs to get a blood test!! OMG! OMG! OMG! So many thoughts running through my head. My mom came, drives me to the doctor, and the doctor orders some blood test. Within hours the results are in and he calls me. Galbladder stones and another BFN. That’s what was causing my sickness. May 29th comes around (2010 still!) and I ended up in the emergency room getting my gallbladder removed. Since I had been sick since the beginning of May the doctor had order to take me off the Metformin and the Provera until further notice.
Ugh! The freaking frustration. Another hold up! What the heck? Come on! Seriously?!? Finally, September 2010 my OBGYN gives the ok to restart the Metformin and Provera. September didn’t work, October didn’t work, and then November comes along and no period. I freaked out! Another BFN once again and my “freaked out” mood, is a frustration mood now. I never got my period for November. It just completely skipped. So my OBGYN is visited once again and started me on Clomid (in addition to the Metformin and Provera). Clomid, the miracle pill. That pill that will get a door knob pregnant, according to resources! OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!! This is it. 2011 will be my year. We are in the end of 2010. It’s December, and I’m starting CLOMID on 100mg (NOT 50 as they recommend to start on, but 100!!!) Oh my god!!
New year’s eve came along. We were at my uncle’s home celebrating with family. 11:55pm. Everyone is up and ready, champagne in hang and our traditional grapes in hand as well. I decide to go to the bathroom before the big MIDNIGHT CONGRATULATORY HUG. I sit on the toilet, start peeing and look down… pink/red residue. Ugh! Didn’t work! The Clomid didn’t work, but that’s fine, at least I got my period this time, right? I leave the restroom, just in time for the ball to drop on the tv. It’s 2011 now… this will be our year! I know it will! It has to be! I’m on all the right meds and my OBGYN (which is no longer my doctor because in 2011 my husband’s new insurance would kick in and she wasn’t covered by it) got me covered until March with new meds so that I can have enough time to seek a new OBGYN. And hopefully be pregnant by then.

2011 was going to be our year…… I just knew it.

-to be continued-

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